Short stories



When I was in high school, they asked me to be in a pep rally. As the class clown, they thought I'd be the right one to dress up as a Devil, the mascot of the opposing team for the homecoming game. I added something I thought was devilish to the red suit and pitchfork they gave me. A sign which read, "Football is antichrist."

After the rally I was accosted by teachers who wanted to know, didn't I take pride in my team and my school?

An army sergeant asked me didn't I take pride in my country, when I told him I wouldn't enlist.

Later on, a Daughter of the American Revolution asked me, didn't I take pride in my ancestry?

And still later, a drunk in a bar who was annoying a woman friend of mine, asked me didn't I take pride in my gender?

The answer to all of them is, "no." I didn't take pride in my team because they weren't my team, they were just a bunch of muscle bound guys who's moronic captain had delighted in beating me up in seventh grade.

I didn't take pride in my school, because if I'd had any say in the matter, I certainly wouldn't have been there.

I take no pride in my country because it is an accident of birth, I didn't choose to be born here.

Equally, I also didn't choose to be born with a white skin, and I certainly don't remember anyone asking, "You want a penis? We got a wide assortment here..."at any time in my life.

No, I only take pride in things that I have chosen and worked for. I take pride in my work when it's good, I'm proud of my wife and the 24 years we've spent building our relationship. I'm proud of my children for the wonderful people they are, and I'm proud of my friends and loved ones because we've all worked hard to be there for each other.

And sometimes, I'm proud of who I am.

Copyright 1998 by Luther Conant III

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All images, text, animations,and music 2000 By Luther C. Conant III (unless where otherwise noted.)